Sunday, January 14, 2018

In the Gray Time

It has been hard to concentrate recently, much less focus on anything.  Three weeks of family illness, my immobilization, a heavy dose of homesickness and winter's gloom have all contributed to a feeling of malaise that is hard to shake.  After a while, you feel like river fog has wrapped itself around you, blocking out the light of day.

When I was prepping for snow and ice, I was wishing there was some sort of checklist for stocking food.  I'm sure there is, somewhere on Google, but pain and discomfort kept me off my laptop during the time when the planning and prepping should have been happening.

 And what do you do if you lose power and you have an all-electric kitchen?  I think I have a Coleman camp stove around somewhere in the garage but do I have propane?  Worse yet, if I do have propane, does the stove even work?  It's been literally decades since it's been used.  I suppose, at a minimum, it needs a good cleaning.

So . . . there is a lot I don't know about and literally, have no idea what to do.  Friends have been excellent sources of information and guidance but there just is nothing that can prepare you for the feeling of icy, hard-packed snow beneath your feet and especially when you are just beginning to feel steady on your feet again.  

Except for Thursday's medical appointment, today is the first day I've been out in a week.  Today I learned what salt looks like on the church steps.  Nancy and Byron kindly picked me up for Mass.  I am definitely going to need driving lessons for navigating snowy roads.  It was cheering to be around people again and the church was warm and snug.  It felt like God was giving me a hug. Coffee afterward added to the uplifted feelings.  I'm convinced that cabin fever is one part being stuck inside and three parts missing the companionship of friends.  

Adding to my total lack of preparedness, I knew I was running low on things in the kitchen.  It never occurred to me to ask for help but apparently, that is what people think of first around here. So thank you, Byron and Nancy, for thinking for me and offering to take me to Hayes before taking me home.  The cupboard isn't quite so bare anymore.  

When I had myself convinced I would have nothing to say this week, the cobwebs miraculously cleared. The fog lifted and I saw my way to gratitude for the friends who help so generously.  But now it has started snowing again.  I suppose there will be a couple more months of this to look forward to.  The next time I'm out, I'll do better at stocking up.


  1. Winters are definitely an adjustment in the midwest. Having grown up in California and moving to Kansas was similar. Now even in Oregon all these years the cold of the rain is colder than a warm rain in California. Take care and be warm!

    1. Absolutely, Marilyn.. Err'ing on the side of caution as I get used to my new normal.

  2. Well, I guess this is the worst time to be where you are. You will sure be so thankful for spring! Your neighbors are so lovely to show you the ropes.


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